Did I ever tell you about mine?
I’m far from a wedding expert. But as I jump back into reading wedding blogs (I love you guys, but sometimes I hate weddings), I’m realizing how valuable a perspective “from the other side” can be.
And, yeah. There was definitely some family drama. Not just arguing-with-my-mom-the-day-before drama (that stuff is so usual, it bores me. I won’t torture you by getting into every little spat. Yawn).
But, grandma walked out in the middle of the wedding.
Through the entire planning process, she was one of the naysayers. Josh and I were being unbelievably cheap, stingy, inconsiderate, low-class… the list goes on. Because we were having dessert (oh, the horror!). Whenever she asked how the wedding planning was going, she would start offering suggestions on how we could have a “real wedding” (however, never offered the financial means to pull it off…)
So, the day of the wedding, she teared up when she saw the “memorial roses,” one of which was set out for her son. She walked arm in arm down the aisle with my brother. She smiled through the ceremony.
But when she found out the reception was a dessert reception, all bets were off. I wasn’t even IN the reception yet, when my grandpop walked over and said, “Well, we’re heading out.”
So. What does a girl do?
To be honest, it was an odd moment for me. Because I got it. I got that it was a big deal that my own grandmother didn’t want to be apart of a celebration of my new marriage. That’s big. But, the moment that grandpop walked over was the same moment I had stepped around the church and seen the reception hall. People were milling around outside, lines were forming to get food and see the guestbook and stack presents. The entire building was practically shaking with the live band kicking things off. I was looking at what seemed to be the most fun party in life– and I was the one who was throwing it.
So, in that moment, my grandmom’s little jab wasn’t so huge. And I kind of think that’s a little microcosm of weddingness for ya. Next to the moment of celebration that I was seeing, that little (big) problem with my grandmom, paled.
In the light of your wedding day, a lot of those dramas are going to shrink and fade.*
Also, I sent her lovely wedding photos of her family having fun at the reception for Christmas. Am I a bitch? Heck yes.
*I said a lot. Because some people have bigger family issues than I did, I’ll admit. And some of that ish lingers. But guess what- you’re starting a new life with someone. Don’t lose sight of the beautiful, wonderful thing you’re doing here.
(all photos via Love Me Do, as usual)