shallow.

by Liz on 09.21

Recently, a discussion surfaced on Twitter regarding how many gorgeous girls are paired with guys who are…

Erm.

Ugly.

Shallow, sure. But no one said it wasn’t.

Partially brought on by my own (possibly prejudiced) wonderings aloud about my friends- all of whom are flawlessly beautiful, and many of whom are dating/marrying straight doofs.

Maybe we all each THINK we’re marrying Adonis, what with our love-goggles and all. Possible, right?

But, there definitely is an objective measurement of attractiveness- “eye of the beholder” notwithstanding. Symmetry and golden ratios have been found to be more attractive. Certain features having prominence over others, too. And so on. You may be more of a George Clooney than a Brad Pitt girl (and why wouldn’t you) but you’re never a Steve Buscemi girl. (or am I wrong there?)

I know that speaking for myself, I dated tons of ugly guys. (well, not tons… I’M NOT THAT KIND OF GIRL, THANKS) And not just in the sense of retrospective wondering, “Wow, what did I see in that guy?” but the straight on, while I’m dating him, thinking, “Well. There are more important things.”

Those relationships weren’t successful. One of the many reasons (Oh so many. So so many), I’m sure, is that I just wasn’t attracted to these guys. Sure, “there are more important things.” But that’s still pretty damn important.

This is where I get to sound even more shallow. I think looks are important. Maybe “looks” isn’t the right word- but attraction. Attraction is important. And that’s why my heart hurts a little bit for my friends- I worry that they’re settling. And I worry that it’s a problem.

So. Do you think attraction is important to the success of a relationship? Do you notice lots of beautiful women paired with ugly guys? And if you do, do you think it’s because of love goggles, or settling?

And here are two articles saying that couples are most successful when the male is less attractive.Which I find weird and appalling and kind of gross.
Psychology Today
NY Daily News

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