halloween traditions.

by Liz on 10.29

 

I’ve said it before. We’re Holiday People. We over-celebrate. We get into the spirit. This was always the case, long before having a kid (but at least we have something to blame it on now).

Really, we just like a good reason (or a lame one) to have some fun.

At Halloween, this translates into a gallon of cider, perpetually in the fridge and ready for warming with cinnamon (and rum, for the grown-ups). It means these spiced wafers (do other people eat these, or is it a Philly thing?) and baking sugar cookies in the shape of bats and a ceramic pumpkin brimming with Reese’s cups.

Okay, so maybe all of our Halloween traditions are food-related. You could’ve seen that coming, be honest.

Today I’ll start construction on the Halloween costumes. I guess homemade costumes are a sort of accidental tradition, too. And then we’ll walk to the neighborhood doughnut shop to buy two doughnuts with black and orange sprinkles, crunching leaves the whole way. Then we’ll come home and watch Arsenic and Old Lace and Charlie Brown over that cinnamony cider.

What are your Halloween traditions?

 

back.

by Liz on 10.25

 

I’ve been short of breath lately.

Not literal, actual, breath but at times, it’s sort of felt that way.

I don’t have ideas. I don’t have energy. I don’t have things to write about on this blog, and even when I’m given a prompt on other writing spaces, I struggle to string multiple words together into sentences that make sense (let alone are poignant or insightful). Things that normally come naturally, suddenly feel impossible.

I squashed this project, back-burnered that, and sheepishly requested a week off from another. I took a few days away from work and internet- normally the cure for this sort of creative roadblock. I napped and walked and read. But instead of feeling newly energized, I continued to feel… blank.

And then Josh got a job.

And oddly, a cloud lifted. I wake up in the morning, and have things to say and ideas to paint.

I didn’t actually know that cloud was there til it wasn’t. It’s been awhile since I’ve been consciously worried about our situation- that’s what’s odd about it all. I’ve been content. I know people talk about hard times inspiring the best creation, but, it hasn’t really been a “hard time.” Not in the volatile, emotional, chaotic sense. It’s just been… distracting. It’s like the pressure of making sure the bills get paid was choking any other thoughts, creativity, inspiration. I didn’t even realize it.

And now that pressure isn’t there. And I can wake up in the morning, think about other things, and not feel like I’m irresponsible or unproductive for having a single thought that wasn’t geared toward alleviating that financial burden.

 

ANYWAY. That’s all. Even though I wasn’t aware of that cloud hanging over me at the time, it feels like it’s dissipated. And I’m glad to be back.

 

 

 

all the anniversaries.

by Liz on 10.11

 

Today is a big day.

It’s been four years since I married this guy.

And today is the last day that he’ll work part-time in retail. Monday, he starts a new job, working in his field, making enough money to pay our bills each month.

(I have to keep repeating those last few phrases to myself. They seem too good to be true, right?)

Josh was laid off just before our wedding, and he’s been on a seesaw of unemployment and underemployment since. The four years we’ve been married have felt so short. But that simultaneous four years of not paying bills has seemed contrarily eternal. And now it’s… over.

So, today we’ll get dressed up and have an expensive drink, remember what it was like to be newlyweds and remark on how nothing’s changed, despite baby and business and whatever else. But we’ll also be remembering all too sharply how all four of these years together have been clouded, always, with just a bit of worry. That part of it gets to be over, now, while the good parts continue on.

 

Weird.

 

 

 

Photo by Love Me Do.